Modi declares Demonetization a colossal failure, cites ‘Thala Ajith never stood in Q outside ATM/Bank’ as the reason

New Delhi: Three months after the announcement of Demonetization and a week after removing all limits for withdrawal, PM Modi has suddenly declared Demonetization a colossal failure.

Meanwhile, RBI has started researching on why Thala Ajith did not stand in queue outside Banks or ATMs.

Meanwhile, RBI has started researching on why Thala Ajith did not stand in the queue outside Banks or ATMs.

The whole country tuned live into news channels when the PMO announced that PM will talk to the nation in a live telecast. The country has still not recovered from the trauma it faced after the Demonetization was announced. So, some already started queuing outside ATMs and Banks.

Modi came live on the screen and started with his usual ‘Bhaiyon Behenon’ and continued, “On November 8, we announced Demonetization. Ever since that, our citizens had been real patriots and overcame their struggles for the sake of greater good. I really salute them. That way, Demonetization can be declared a success. Also, by GDP estimates too, it can be declared a success. But, I had not declared it a success till now. ‘Why did we not declare it a success?’ you may all wonder. ”

Pausing for few seconds, he started with ‘Mitron’ and continued, “Ever since I became PM and started tweeting from official accounts, my team would read all replies made by our citizens. My data analytics team said to me that most of the brothers from south India wanted me to meet someone called Ajith Kumar. They came up with a detailed study on Ajith and that is how I started watching Thala Ajith movies. They were all revealed to be superhit by my team which read most of the tweets of his fans. Moreover, I was told that he is an epitome of simplicity and always stood in the queue outside polling booths. Coming back to Demonetization, I told Arun Jaitley that ‘Look Mr. Jaitley. Demonetization is a success only if Thala Ajith supports it and stands outside ATM or Bank’ on the night of Nov 8. But things didn’t seem to be on our side.”

He then concluded, “My fellow Indians, our team scanned through tweets and Behindwoods posts and found out that Thala Ajith was never seen standing outside ATMs or Banks from Nov 8. We waited until March 12. But he never showed up. If a simple humble man like Thala did not come out in support of it, it means that common men too reject Demonetization. So, I hereby declare that my plan was a colossal failure. And I beg pardon from the 125 crore people of this country. Jai Hind!”

An Expert on Ajith spoke to Unreal Times Tamil. He said, “Modi being inspired by Thala Ajith is nothing great. The great people of this world like Gandhi and Lincoln were inspired by Thala and made themselves very simple. Modi named his show as ‘Mann Ki Baat’ after ‘Mann Ka Tha’. He addressed people as ‘130 crore minus five’ because Mangatha grossed 130 crore and Modi is simply obsessed with that. Not only that, World Bank has said that Ajith movies only contributes to GDP and saves India from bankruptcy. I’m a Thala veriyan now!”